Saturday, January 8, 2011

National Winter Trails Day!

Happy National Winter Trails Day, everyone! Go...make a trail...winterly. Or something.

Whatevs.

Anyway, today's WFTH are from the Fairly Mean category! My comments are in italics! Enjoy! :D

"I can actually see everyone! Wow, there's a lot of ugly people out there!" Oh, yeah? Well, all the ugly people can see you too! And they're armed with rotten tomatoes and flying squids! (The miniature, handheld kind.) (Handheld squids are the best.)

"Yes. He happens to be a very bad cow." As opposed to humanitarian cows. Er...beefetarian? Ah, who knows.

"But if you have to insult someone, that lazy slob, I mean lovely person..." Suuuure you meant that. Let us arm these lovely slobs with tomatoes too...although that'd be kinda pointless, I suppose.

Person 1: "Dead on the inside and an invisible girlfriend. He has issues."
Person 2: "That's why he's dead on the inside." True dat. (Professionally, this is what we call an interior-zombie. FYI.)

"I didn't see them kill anybody while they did it." There were several bodies left on the scene afterwards, but I'm sure that was a complete coincidence.

Friday, January 7, 2011

So guess what?

I found a note in my pocket, which reads: "bcr; lic; job? dia? roe! WILBUR Jan 1 1863; duct tape" in my handwriting.

If you have any idea what it means, please inform me....because otherwise I'm pretty much out of luck.

Sometimes secret codes can be too secret. Or perhaps abbreviations can be too...abbreviated.

Or maybe I just write random letters of nonsense and put them in my pocket to confuse myself later.

I may never know the answer.

But rather than philosophically musing (or whatever the heck that was), let us carry on, to today's WFTH! Today's quotes are from the Roulette Wheel category! (Roulette Wheel=Anything goes! :D) My comments are in italics! Enjoy! :)

"[curious] Why are you trying to rip your face off?" Is this another of those...whaddyacallem...rhetorical questions? 'Cause...I dunno the answer either.

"I wanna human-sacrifice him!" I have never, before this day, seen human-sacrifice as a verb. I now resolve to use it in every sentence possible. Starting now. *ahem* I eat burritos every morning after I human-sacrifice my chili. ....Waiiiiit...

Person 1: "I remember you saying, 'Oh, I swear on my life I will help you.'"
Person 2: "Well, you have a really bad memory, then."
Person 1: "Maybe you have multiple-personality disorder, did you ever think of that? Maybe one of your other personalities said it."
Person 2: "No."
Person 1: "I think it'd be nice to have multiple-personality disorder. Only if they could communicate, though. It'd be like having friends in a pocket."
Person 2: "Friends in a pocket?"
Person 1: "Friends-2-Go." No. Just...no.

"'Cause he cut his head off with a fire ax." Of course, why do you ax?

Person 1: "That's what happens when you're a boy scout and you turn 18. You become:"
Person 1 & 2: "A MAN SCOUT."
Person 2: "And then there's a different kind of man scout, in which you go--"
Person 1 & 2: "SCOUTING for MEN." Um.....well.....okay, I have no idea.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Hey-o!

Yola, yola! Happy Bean Day! (That's a boring holiday. Lame.)

...Unless they're jellybeans!! Yaaaaay!
 


(Sorry. Couldn't resist.) (Although I'm not sure why they're everywhere...ah, well. They're probably invading.)

Today's Words are from the Fairly Mean category! My comments are in italics! Enjoy! :D

"Remind me not to trust you around animals. Puppy pusher! Pointy stick! Pointy stick! Stab, stab stab!" Ummmm...

"Where would you put your brain, though? Oh wait. You don't have a brain." Hey, you could write a song about that.

"She tried to poison me!" Not again!

"There's a delicate balance in life between great ideas and stuff that works. This is a great idea, but it sucks!" Gee, thanks. Way to crush my hopes and dreams, teacher. (Sadness.)

Monday, January 3, 2011

Festival of Sleep Day! Rock on!!

Hello! Please have a nice nap to celebrate Festival of Sleep Day! (Ironic...since I had to get up at 6:15 this morning...you'd think there'd at least be a day off of school but no.) :D

I have another Pepsi-Refresh Everything idea to promote! If you're reading this and you want an instant karma boost (or something...whatevs), please go to http://www.refresheverything.com/lowerninthward and vote to help refresh people's lives in New Orleans; the voting is still open every day so if you vote every day for the next few weeks, that just increases the chances that this will get chosen! You don't have to buy anything, just click! Or, if you don't want to go to all that trouble, you can text the number 105560 to PEPSI (73774) to support this community--you can vote this way every day, too! Thanks ever so much! For more details, go to the earlier post about Pepsi Refresh or just click on the link to see what the grant money they would like to receive (which you're voting to help them do) goes toward. Thanks!!

(By the way, the Shoes 4 The Shoeless one? Came in 6th place out of a ton, and got the funding it needed!!! Thanks so much to everyone who voted to help these kids get shoes on their feet, and socks too, not to mention being put in the system which will provide new, bigger shoes when those ones wear off! :D) So you've got a lot of influence; use it well, young Padawans! (LOL.)


Ooookay. Back to WFTH. Today's are from the Say What? category! My comments are in italics! Enjoy! :D

"I am a giant squid of anger!" Run away. Eek.

"I hate feet! Go away! Smother them!" Ummm, hate to break it to ya, but: Feet cannot be smothered because they don't breathe. But go ahead and try!

"Yeah, my bellybutton was puckering and unpuckering the whole time." Ew! This was a teacher! I did not need to know that! Even with a student saying it it's TMI.

"I might as well have gotten plastic surgery and you would have exploded: 'Oh! She has two heads!'" Good point. I think. But it would have been a good explosion.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Send-it-in Sunday again!

Hello, ladies and gents! Today is another Send-it-in Sunday! Feel free to post any WFTH you may have heard in the comments--you might see them used in a post in future! (Obviously you can post WFTH anytime in the comments, as well! :D)

Today's quotes are from the Rather Duh-Inspiring category! My comments are in italics! Enjoy! :D

"Why is their money printed on paper?" I hate to break this to ya, but...yours is too!

"Well, stab her gently!" Um. Good plan.

"Are you offended because I won't copy your paper?" Yup. That's exactly it.

"Can I see your eyeball?" I dunno, can you?

"That child just disappeared in thin air!" Well, it's better than pudgy air, I s'pose.

"I want Amish peanut butter!" As opposed to...city-dwelling peanut butter?