"[summarizing a poem] Okay, then...person...want...friend...dig up plants...move across town!" Caveman...love...
"I hate spiders. My buddy and I went huntin' once and I walk into this huge spiderweb. I shot it." I'm sure that helped the situation a lot.
"Let me cure the slime for you!" Uummm, feel free.
Person 1: "At 4:30 in the morning, 'spork' is the funniest word in the world."
Person 2: "'Sponge' is 3:30, 'spork' is 4:30--and at 2 in the morning: 'handcuffs.'" Thank you. I will now make a chart for extra reference.
"Does anybody know how to do this crap so I don't die on the pedestal of doom?" Nope! Have fun on your doomly pedestal!