National Roast Leg of Lamb Day!!!

Um. Okay, so Happy National Roast Leg Of Lamb Day!!! What you do with the rest of the lamb is up to you, I guess.

Random Picture of the Day:

Fascinating.

Anyway, today's Words are from the Random Roulette Wheel category. My comments are in italics! Enjoy! :D


Person 1: "Go! Go with the speed of ten thousand wolves."
Person 2: "That's pretty fast."
Person 3: "Actually, ten thousand wolves would be pretty slow." When you're all quite through.

"He broke my penguin." I would say I've never heard anything sadder, but...I don't care that much.

Person 1: "It's a giant gummi bear, almost five pounds by himself."
Person 2: "Is that even legal?" No. Actually, he gets arrested every day just for existing. It's a sad, sad truth.

"I know how to sleep faster than the speed of smell." So...you don't know how to sleep at all?

National Crepe Suzette Day

Happy National Crepe Suzette Day! I haven't a clue what that is supposed to mean! ...I've noticed this is becoming a theme this week. Interesting...

Random picture of the day:

...alrighty, then.

Anyway, today's Words are from the Random Roulette Wheel category--could be anything! My comments, as always, are in italics. Enjoy! :D

"This is my ham child." *talking-to-kids-or-dogs voice* Oh, aren't you the greasiest little thing? Yes you are! Yes you are!

"I miss bruises from soccer, I really do. I had bruises all across my knees--it was so cool." Yeah. Cool in that...painful...kind of way.

"Want a peanut butter fish sandwich?" Um, no. Ever.

"If it wasn't for that horse, I would never have made it though my first year of college." I mean, that horse did everything for me. Washing the dishes, however, proved to be a problem. I think I lost more money paying for dishes 'Mr. Butterhooves' dropped than I did paying for textbooks. Absolutely redonkulous.

National Chocolate Custard Month!

It's National Chocolate Custard Month, and National Hoagie Day! (Let's combine them and get chocolate hoagies--delicious!) (I bet it'd be more delicious if I knew what a hoagie was!) (Maybe not!)

Random picture of the day:

Mmm...must be a chocolate hoagie.

Anyway, today's Words are from the Conversations category. My comments are in italics! Enjoy! :D

Person 1: "Bus 23 is being replaced by Bus 37."
Person 2: "Bus 23 is being replaced by a duck."
Person 3: "Reeeeally."
Person 2: "An amphibious duck." That's very nice, but how on earth is it going to fit all the passengers? Maybe...it's a ginormous amphibious duck! That would be so cool!

***

Person 1: "That secret is kept like...like..."
Person 2: "Like the plague!"
Person 1: "Like something that is really kept." I always keep my plagues in a safe box in the ice tray of the freezer of the basement of my castle of the hill...well...let's just say they're really kept.

***

Person 1: "See the forty-mile-per-hour stop sign?"
Person 2: "Noooo..." Duh--it went by too fast! I bet you couldn't see something that was running at forty miles an hour either!

***

Person 1: "But I don't want them to turn into pink carnations! I want them to turn into knees!"
Person 2: "They are knees..." ...wow...

National Candied Orange Peel Day!

Happy National Candied Orange Peel Day! I don't know what that is, but it sounds both delicious and national!

Random picture of the day:

Ooooh! Butterfly! I like butterflies! ...for breakfast...
Anyway, today's WFTH are from the category of Say What? My comments are in italics! Enjoy! :D

"My teeth hurt so I don't know if I'll be able to read." Mmm-hmmm...so if your eyes hurt you wouldn't be able to brush your teeth?

"I don't know about the 'likes Spandex.'" Ooookay.

"I just want someone to pour paint on me." Because, really, who doesn't want that?

"I'm using Aubrey as a weapon." *psychiatrist voice* And how does that make her feel?

National Hamburger Month!

Did you know that we are also in the midst of National Hamburger Month? I think we should combine this week and this month and make National Raisin Hamburgers! *gag* Neeeever mind.

Random picture of the day:

And the moral of this cake is that time is delicious.

Anyway, today's Words are from the Fairly Mean category. My comments are in italics! Enjoy! :D

Person 1: "I'm back! Are you happy!"
Person 2 [singing]: "If it makes you happy..."
Person 3: "It makes me so sad I could cry." Quite the welcomed returning hero, this one.

"Why, why, why? I always punch people, and they never cry!" Probably just to spite you. Also because you are as strong as three-point-five feathers.

"[It's] Thank God Cats Taste Like Chicken Day." Actually, no it is not! I would know!

Person 1: "I'll give every senior a flower."
Person 2: "Give 'em Venus flytraps!" I take it you're not a big fan of seniors.

National Raisin Week! (ew)

Were you aware that we are in the midst of National Raisin Week? It started yesterday, apparently, without my consent or permission! Who wants to celebrate raisins all week? They're all wrinkly and gross! Like fingers that have been swimming for the last thousand years! Only they somehow worm their way into otherwise perfectly good cookies just to disappoint millions of tastebuds everywhere!

*sigh*

Okay, I permit National Little Bits Of Nasty Week, also known by everyone except me as National Raisin Week, to continue. But don't expect me to accept it or participate in it.

Random picture of the day:

Oookay. This fish appears to have created his own little aquatic bunker for no real reason. Good for you, little clownfish! Or whateverfish!

Aaaaanyway, today's WFTH are from the category of Say What? My comments are in italics! Enjoy! :D

"Did you just say it's a disappointment to the phantom of basketball?" The phantom of basketball curses you for all tiiiiiiime! Lots of orange-colored doooooom shall descend upon your faaaaace!

"Play me a mountain!" Ummmmmno.

"I'm doing my homework! I'm breaking the laws!" Iiiif you say so.

"I've never heard anyone think that way before." Hmm. Well, I've never heard anyone think before, so, mayhaps you've got a problem. Or, really, the person thinking audibly has probably got the problem.

Save The Rhino Day!

Happy Mother Goose Day and Save The Rhino Day! Save the rhino! He's being attacked by a goose with children! Nooooooooo! Okay, I'm over it now.

Random Picture of the Day:

...because that's not creepy at all.

Anyway, today's Words are from the Fairly Mean category! My comments are in italics! Enjoy! :D

"You can't even wear tape." Are you kidding me? Anyone can wear tape. They're all the rage these days. Tape can be worn by anyone and goes with anything--it's like jeans. Only a lot more painful to take off of bare skin.

"They're gonna say my eyes suck at life." Nope, too late. They already said it.

"Last time you punched me I got a bruise! And I gave it to you!" 'Tis the season of giving.

"I'll give you a few minutes to, uh, kill the mockingbird if you need to." Gee, thanks.