...Guess who thought it was actually Friday and forgot about the Bonus post until just now? That would be me. :) Hope you were looking forward to it! And...Happy Creamsicle Day!
Today's Bonus Post Category is....Random! The ones that just don't make any sense at all! :) My comments are in italics! Enjoy!
"Do you know that all cactuses have mustaches?" Do you know that I think you're failing Cactusology?
Person 1: "Blue monkey at night, sailors' delight."
Person 2: "Is that how it goes?"
Person 1: "Blue monkey in the morning, sailors take warning. Actually, blue monkey pretty much anytime, sailors take warning." Obviously words from an experienced sailor.
"And then you square root the monkey by the kangaroo which goes hoppy hop hop." And then we try to graduate from the kindergarten version of Calculus...
"She shaved her head with an umbrella? What?" That, my friend, is a very good question.
"You were, like, 'haha, spleeeeeeen!'" I was backing away slowly at the time, as I recall.
Saturday, August 14, 2010
It's Rainin' Duhs...
...and water, occasionally. :) Anyway, today's topic of WFTH is...Rather Duh-Inspiring. (Hence, the title.) (Duh.) :D My comments are in italics! Enjoy!
"So, you're telling me, your face is a face." I dunno...my face is a waffle, but whatev.
"It's not nice to kill people." Really? Thanks, Einstein!
"You don't have to tell us, you can just say it." And that's different from telling, how, exactly??
"He literally just tried to eat a chip and failed!" Thanks for the play-by-play! ...I guess.
"So, you're telling me, your face is a face." I dunno...my face is a waffle, but whatev.
"It's not nice to kill people." Really? Thanks, Einstein!
"You don't have to tell us, you can just say it." And that's different from telling, how, exactly??
"He literally just tried to eat a chip and failed!" Thanks for the play-by-play! ...I guess.
Friday, August 13, 2010
Friday, and the livin' is easy...
...and our miniature cookie-house crumbled, so we get to eat the walls...yum! Today's Words From The Hallway are in the category of: Don't Make Any Sense! Enjoy! My comments are in italics! :)
"Let's go purchase our boarding tickets of doom!!" Why so excited? Also...it's the middle of lunch--where exactly are these doomed tickets coming from?
Person 1: "Why do I care?"
Person 2: [menacingly] "You don't care." Oh, okay. If you say so. Don't menace at me!
"You just pushed my zombie button." Oh, nooo! Not the zombie button!!! ...remind me what that does, again?
"I made the mutual decision with myself that I'm going to fail this class." What a great plan. Have fun!
"[very serious, thoughtful tone] I'm thinking of growing a tentacle." Me too. Well, I've been planning it for a while now, but just couldn't, ya know, figure out how to.
"Let's go purchase our boarding tickets of doom!!" Why so excited? Also...it's the middle of lunch--where exactly are these doomed tickets coming from?
Person 1: "Why do I care?"
Person 2: [menacingly] "You don't care." Oh, okay. If you say so. Don't menace at me!
"You just pushed my zombie button." Oh, nooo! Not the zombie button!!! ...remind me what that does, again?
"I made the mutual decision with myself that I'm going to fail this class." What a great plan. Have fun!
"[very serious, thoughtful tone] I'm thinking of growing a tentacle." Me too. Well, I've been planning it for a while now, but just couldn't, ya know, figure out how to.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Good Morning/Afternoon/Whatever!!
Ahhh...the lazy days of summer...when one can sleep in 'till 10:16 a.m. :) Like today. :) Only, I have to post early because of a meetingy-thing, so...ta-da!! Words From The Hallway, at your service! My comments are in italics! Oh, and by the way, the next week or so's postings may be a little late, but I will post every day! Anyway, today's WFTH are...(drumroll please)...Fairly Mean!
Person 1: "I was a brilliant child, wasn't I?"
Person 2: "Honey, you chewed on sticks, rocks, and windowsills. I wouldn't exactly call you the brightest bulb." Nice. This is Person 1's mom talking. :) But you know what they say, it's not mean if it's true! ...Or maybe that's about bragging...huh.
"What are you stupiding about now?" Huh. And here I thought people who use 'stupid' as a verb were the stupiding ones.
"I like meeting germaphobes, 'cause I, like, cough on them...yeah. I'm a bad person." Ah-choo!
Person 1: "Your fingers are big--they're like mozzerella sticks. Mine are like French fries."
Person 2: "You're about to find out what mozzerella sticks taste like--I'm gonna give you a knuckle sandwich!" Oh, yeah? Well, I'm...hungry. Hmmph.
Person 1: "I was a brilliant child, wasn't I?"
Person 2: "Honey, you chewed on sticks, rocks, and windowsills. I wouldn't exactly call you the brightest bulb." Nice. This is Person 1's mom talking. :) But you know what they say, it's not mean if it's true! ...Or maybe that's about bragging...huh.
"What are you stupiding about now?" Huh. And here I thought people who use 'stupid' as a verb were the stupiding ones.
"I like meeting germaphobes, 'cause I, like, cough on them...yeah. I'm a bad person." Ah-choo!
Person 1: "Your fingers are big--they're like mozzerella sticks. Mine are like French fries."
Person 2: "You're about to find out what mozzerella sticks taste like--I'm gonna give you a knuckle sandwich!" Oh, yeah? Well, I'm...hungry. Hmmph.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Another All-Random Day!!
...Because I'm on a ten-minute publishing deadline for this post, and frankly, there are a lot more quotes that just don't make any sense than quotes that do. :) My comments, as always, are in italics.
"Please do not consume my knee, as I am rather fond of it." But what if I'm really, really hungry?
"I'm on an emotional roller coaster about underwear." ...Do I want to know why?
"I'm giving up spontaneously combusting." Gee, thanks.
"You laughed in my hair. I don't like it when people hair-laugh." And I don't like it when people make up hyphenated words, but that doesn't stop it from happening.
"Oh my gosh, I just opened the bathroom door with my head!" Well, that is exciting. I'm excited for you! But can I just say, the bathrooms at our school don't have doors?
"Please do not consume my knee, as I am rather fond of it." But what if I'm really, really hungry?
"I'm on an emotional roller coaster about underwear." ...Do I want to know why?
"I'm giving up spontaneously combusting." Gee, thanks.
"You laughed in my hair. I don't like it when people hair-laugh." And I don't like it when people make up hyphenated words, but that doesn't stop it from happening.
"Oh my gosh, I just opened the bathroom door with my head!" Well, that is exciting. I'm excited for you! But can I just say, the bathrooms at our school don't have doors?
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Happy Lazy Day!
Wow...it's like a holiday engineered especially for me! How nice! The question is: Do I get presents for being lazy, and does typing disqualify me? ;-) Anyway, today's Words From The Hallway are under the topic of...Kinda Gross!
"It was dead silent, and I was just thinking, 'please let someone fart.'"
"Lacerated liver. Or is it spleen?"
Person 1: "For example, you shove someone through a window. There may be heavy bleeding."
Person 2: "It's only happened four times."
(I know this is actually random, but I just had to throw this one in...)
"Someone literally signed in with the excuse that there was a ninja zombie attack."
"It was dead silent, and I was just thinking, 'please let someone fart.'"
"Lacerated liver. Or is it spleen?"
Person 1: "For example, you shove someone through a window. There may be heavy bleeding."
Person 2: "It's only happened four times."
(I know this is actually random, but I just had to throw this one in...)
"Someone literally signed in with the excuse that there was a ninja zombie attack."
Monday, August 9, 2010
Brevity, Wit's Soul, etc.
Yola! You may have heard that "Brevity is the soul of wit." (Not sure who said that...feel free to Google it or whatever.) Basically that means that things are funnier in short doses, and someone told me I should apply that to Words From The Hallway, so...I'm going to try four or five quotes per post for a while, tell me what you think! :) If you like it, comment! If you hate it, comment! :) Besides, it's easier to read a quick post, of course! Anyway, enjoy! Today's post is all-random!
"If you were a mermaid, I'd spit on your hair."
"Seriously, what are sea monkeys? I used to take them out of their cage and throw them in the recycling."
Person 1: "Hippos are large animals. Are they fast or slow?"
Person 2: "Uh, viscious."
"And the chicken that wasn't eaten sent the bear to get the chicken because he was cheating on another chicken."
"Oh, slapping a guy with a fish is hilarious. So if I slap him, it will be hilarious."
"If you were a mermaid, I'd spit on your hair."
"Seriously, what are sea monkeys? I used to take them out of their cage and throw them in the recycling."
Person 1: "Hippos are large animals. Are they fast or slow?"
Person 2: "Uh, viscious."
"And the chicken that wasn't eaten sent the bear to get the chicken because he was cheating on another chicken."
"Oh, slapping a guy with a fish is hilarious. So if I slap him, it will be hilarious."
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Send-it-in Sunday!
Hey, all! Eve here, as usual. If you want to donate a funny quote you've heard at your school, office, the mall, wherever, feel free to put it in your comments to Sunday posts--that's why they're called Send-it-in Sundays! :) They might just show up in the blog itself! :)
Now...the main course! Serving up a Sunday platter-o-quotes! My comments are in italics! Toodles!
Some are fairly mean:
"That's not an ugly blob, that's your face! Wait...that came out wrong." Really?
Person 1 (student): "Ow!"
Person 2 (teacher): "Did you hit him?"
Person 3 (student): "No, he hit himself in the face with a spoon."
Person 2 (teacher): "Aw, too bad. I was going to give you extra credit."
Some are kinda gross:
"You just ripped his leg hair out." And I'm sure it looks lovely now. Not to mention the pain.
"[excited squeal] I wanna blow my nose on them!!"
Some are rather duh-inspiring:
"Somehow I got negative zero." Kind of like your grade in math if you don't get a different answer.
"You know what chocolate milk tastes like? Cold hot chocolate!" ...wow.
And some don't make any sense at all!
"I have so much homework I'm gonna blow up."
"She just called me a very special pickle." That's a compliment. Really.
"[annoyed] And then the flower's, like, a snotty flower!"
Person 1: "Oh! A banana! Oh, wait, that's not a banana."
Person 2: "Yeah. It's a star-bellied fish."
"My feet could, like, eat your feet. Om nom nom..." Oookay...
Person 1: "In Social Studies, we were talking about penguins?"
Person 2: "What does that have to do with E-flat?"
Person 1: "Oh, it does. A lot. They quack in E-flat."
Person 3: "Penguins don't quack! They bark!"
Person 1: "Seals bark!"
Person 3: "Penguins do too!"
Person 2: "Penguins speak Swedish."
Person 3: "Swedish fish are from Canada."
Now...the main course! Serving up a Sunday platter-o-quotes! My comments are in italics! Toodles!
Some are fairly mean:
"That's not an ugly blob, that's your face! Wait...that came out wrong." Really?
Person 1 (student): "Ow!"
Person 2 (teacher): "Did you hit him?"
Person 3 (student): "No, he hit himself in the face with a spoon."
Person 2 (teacher): "Aw, too bad. I was going to give you extra credit."
Some are kinda gross:
"You just ripped his leg hair out." And I'm sure it looks lovely now. Not to mention the pain.
"[excited squeal] I wanna blow my nose on them!!"
Some are rather duh-inspiring:
"Somehow I got negative zero." Kind of like your grade in math if you don't get a different answer.
"You know what chocolate milk tastes like? Cold hot chocolate!" ...wow.
And some don't make any sense at all!
"I have so much homework I'm gonna blow up."
"She just called me a very special pickle." That's a compliment. Really.
"[annoyed] And then the flower's, like, a snotty flower!"
Person 1: "Oh! A banana! Oh, wait, that's not a banana."
Person 2: "Yeah. It's a star-bellied fish."
"My feet could, like, eat your feet. Om nom nom..." Oookay...
Person 1: "In Social Studies, we were talking about penguins?"
Person 2: "What does that have to do with E-flat?"
Person 1: "Oh, it does. A lot. They quack in E-flat."
Person 3: "Penguins don't quack! They bark!"
Person 1: "Seals bark!"
Person 3: "Penguins do too!"
Person 2: "Penguins speak Swedish."
Person 3: "Swedish fish are from Canada."
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